How To Control Anger As A Christian Mom: Use My 6 Step Process To Stay Calm Even When Kids Are Driving You Crazy // Episode 77

What are we talking about today?

Isn’t stress fun? Wait. NO. It is never fun! But, it happens to all of us. 

And typically, when we start to feel stressed, we also start to be more easily irritated, less calm, and we experience more conflict or struggle in our relationships. Whether it’s a day-to-day moment of stress or we are entering a season of life that will be stressful for awhile, stress is hard. 

So today, I’m sharing a 6-step process for dealing with stress: the S-T-R-E-S-S formula to build more calm and peace into your life, even if the things that are stressing you out don’t change. 

Let’s dive in.

Listen to Episode 77:

If today’s topic is meaningful to you, you’ll also want to check out these earlier podcast episodes that connect with this same topic:

  • Episode 19 // Start resolving conflict in your marriage TODAY by managing difficult conversations with less stress and more peace
  • Episode 31 // Keep your cool, mama! Here’s my quick 4-step process for handling frustration and impatience with my kids… no yelling, door slamming, or anger management necessary.
  • Episode 44 // The key to happiness, intimacy, and healthy relationships: Loving your actual life and your actual people.
  • Episode 73 // Dealing with the overwhelming seasons of life: 9 super practical tips to live by GRACE and replace stress with SUCCESS as a busy mom

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Snag your resources here!

Cover image for the 40 Day Devotional on Mom Anger and Emotional Regulation

Don’t let that mom anger get the best of you just because you’re feeling stressed out. It can be hard when we are stretched so thin! This devotional will help you keep your cool and go deeper into God’s wisdom for managing hard emotions.

Let me also offer two FREE resource that I know will be helpful:

A 6-step process for managing stress and keeping a peaceful home in the process

[This post may contain affiliate links. If a purchase is made, I may receive a small commission at no extra charge to you.] 

Today's Episode Highlights

Stress will reduce your enjoyment of your family life, and probably make you more irritable, less fun, and bring about more conflict and struggle in your marriage and friendships. 

Simply put… it’s bad news!

Bad for us and bad for the people we love the most. So let’s walk through the S-T-R-E-S-S process to reducing stress, staying calm, and maintaining a peaceful home even in the harder seasons of life.


Start by identifying the situations or things that are most likely to increase your stress. There are probably certain events, situations, or even people that tend to lead you into feeling stressed out. It might happen once in awhile or on a regular basis… but you need to identify these stressors. 

Only then can you do something about them!

Consider: how could you reduce these stressors in your life? How could you approach them in a different way to reduce their stress?


In most situations of life, we have an automatic thought process that pops up without us noticing… and it might help or hurt our reaction to the situation at hand. 

So as you consider your common stressors, take time to identify those automatic thoughts. And then evaluate them. Challenge them! Make sure they are actually true and helpful. Typically, if you’re feeling stressed out, those thoughts are either untrue, unhelpful, or triggering hard emotions. 

Ask yourself: Is this thought true? What’s my evidence? Is it helpful? Is it increasing or decreasing my stress?

And consider the truth of Philippians 4:7 – your thought life matters!


As you assess and learn to manage stressors and thoughts, you also need to be intentional about your leisure time. This “me time” or “self care time” is important for enjoying life and managing the ups and downs that come with it. 

What are the activities that refresh you? Relax you? Energize you? These need to be a regular and consistent part of your routine. 

Self care can be difficult to make time for when we’re stressed and busy. But it matters! Grab my free 51 Self Care Ideas List to get started with some quick and easy ideas.


Our use of electronics, and specifically screen time, definitely impact our stress levels. So when you’re starting to feel stressed, this is an important area to focus on.

Screen time likely includes social media, television or movies, You Tube, video gaming, and more. Are these things inherently bad? No. But they do all have a tendency to suck away more of our time than they think they do, and because they are typically very passive we are not often refreshed by time spent on these electronics. 

During a season of stress, take time to actually look at how much time you’re spending on screens, and reduce it. You can track it yourself or look in your phone Settings for helpful information on this. 

Also, it may help to limit or be more intentional about what you are actually consuming and engaging with. What shows are you watching? Who are you following on social media? This will impact your emotional and mental health… including stress levels. 

Social Life

Spending time with people we love reduces our stress level. When our relationships are healthy and strong, and we are spending quality time with our people, we are much better protected from stress and its negative impacts on us. 

So start by dealing with any problems in your relationships. Work on communication, conflict, past hurts, or areas needing forgiveness. 

My free 10-point Conflict Resolution Checklist may help here, as well as the 40-Day Devotional on Communication in Marriage!

As you deal with stress, make sure to intentionally plan time with your favorite people. And this includes your time with God! It’s easy to start neglecting our family nights or morning Bible readings when we feel stressed and overwhelmed. But in reality, this is probably when those are most needed and helpful.


A big cause of stress is over-filling our calendar, keeping an unrealistic to-do list, or simply putting way too much on our plate.

So for the short-term season of stress AND the long-term prevention of stress, look at your calendar and schedule… and be ruthless.

Start by identifying your actual priorities in this season of life, and then compare that against your current schedule. You’ll want to not only look at your personal to-do list but your family calendar and work schedule as well. 

What must stay? What is nice but could be removed for the sake of your sanity? Where is the white space, the recreation time, the family and friend get-togethers, and the space for spiritual habits?

As you look at your calendar and schedule, plug in the top priorities first and then see what’s left for the other stuff.

I love The Hope Planner for managing my chaotic family life, because it keeps God first and focuses me on my priorities before my task list. You can check out The Hope Planner here!

Friday Faith Follow-up

When we’re feeling stressed, we tend to get stuck thinking about the things that are stressing us out, and the hard emotions that come with it. (And hopefully the S-T-R-E-S-S steps above are helpful!)

But it is SO MUCH more helpful and encouraging to think instead about the truths God gives us in the Bible. He’s in control. He knows what’s happening. He is good. 

Today, join me for a quick devotional look at how we can turn away from the things stressing us out and turn TOWARD God – a God who is good, who is powerful, and who always works things out for good… even when we don’t see it or understand it ourselves.

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A reminder of the Disclaimers & Disclosures Policy: I am an affiliate with many of the resources I recommend, which means I may receive a small commission if you make a purchase through my provided links. I never recommend products I don’t love! Also, I am a licensed therapist but this podcast is not therapy. It is not professional or personal advice to your specific situation. Get info about professional counseling here.