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Episode 85 // Finding the secret formula for raising (and enjoying!) your Christian family

What are we talking about today?

Hey, mama. Do you want to live the good life? Enjoy your family, enjoy your marriage, and make it through the good and bad times with a sense of peace?

That’s exactly what we’re talking about today. 

Jesus promises us an abundant life. How do we live into that when life is hectic and overwhelming?

Let’s dive in.

Listen to Episode 85:

If today’s topic is meaningful to you, you’ll also want to check out these earlier podcast episodes that connect with this same topic:

  • Episode 48 // Want more quality time with your kids? Here are my 5 secret weapons to finding those great bonding moments.
  • Episode 35 // Do you want happy relationships? Let’s talk about the need for REALISTIC expectations of yourself and others.
  • Episode 63 // Finding peace in your home & your life: 5 things that disrupt our peace, and practical steps to get it back

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Snag your resources here!

If you’re feeling strained or stuck in your family relationships, this devotional is the right place to start. We simply cannot invest in our family properly if we are not well-grounded in our relationship with Jesus! Go through 8 biblical truths about your identity in Jesus.

Let me also offer a FREE resource that I know will be helpful:

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Today's Episode Highlights

The secret formula to enjoying family life is the same as the secret formula for enjoying anything else in life. 

I’m not going to beat around the bush or drag this out.

The secret formula?

LIVE BY GRACE.

Ultimately, that’s what life comes down to. It’s not about “if I do X then I can expect Y and Z to happen. It’s not about a checklist of things to do every day. There are no secret steps to raising the perfect kids. No formula for ensuring the perfect marriage. 

Life is messy, life is filled with troubles, and if we want to do it well, live the good life, and enjoy our (chaotic) family… We must follow Jesus and live by the grace that God alone offers.

What is grace?

Simply put, grace is undeserved favor from God. We get good things from God – salvation, peace, etc – that we have not and never could earn. Consider Romans 3:24, which tells us, “[We] are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus.”

But that’s not all. 

Grace is ALSO God working in our lives to give us motivation, power, and ability to live well and make holy changes.

Here, we can look at 2 Corinthians 9:8. “God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work.”

God gives us good things that we can never deserve, AND He is always at work in our lives to help us live well. 

Do you want to enjoy family life? Press into this grace. 

Jesus says to Paul, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)

Ultimately… this is all we need.

Yes, you are weak. I am too! Family life can be hard. Motherhood is often exhausting. Marriages sometimes feel strained.

But in all of our weakness… God’s grace is sufficient for us.

How does a deeper understanding of grace impact how we raise and enjoy our family?

Grace allow us to recognize ourselves as sinners first, and come to Jesus before dealing with any issues in our other family members.  This means we then can come to them with more humility, compassion, care… AND GRACE.

Not only this, but grace frees us from the to-do list, the checklist, and all the things we think we “have to do” for our family. We can simply turn to God, ask for wisdom (like James 1 tells us to do), and enjoy these relationships… BY GRACE

Every day is a new day… really, every moment is a new moment! Did you blow up during an argument with your husband? That does not need to define your relationship moving forward. Did you lose your temper with your kid? You can move past that… BY GRACE.

How can we live more deeply in GRACE?

Let’s consider 3 practical ways that we can live by grace. 

First: abide in Jesus. Spend time with him, trust him, get to know him, ask him what to do, let him lead you and shape you. Consider this truth from John 15:

“I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener… 4 Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. 5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. 7 If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.

Next, build up your faith. Pray and ask for more faith, invest time and energy into daily spiritual habits that build faith, and act according to God’s Word even when you don’t understand it.

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. Ephesians2:8-9

Finally, ask for wisdom. One of the big reasons Eve ate the fruit is because she desired the wisdom that the serpent told her it would give her. But she could have just asked God! He loves to give us wisdom, and wisdom will always draw us deeper and deeper to him.

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. James 1:5

Friday Faith Follow-up

Who are you? What is your identity? How do you think about yourself on the crazy days of life? If we truly understand our identity in Christ, our experience of daily life is so much richer. God created us, loves us, and defines us. Join me in this quick follow-up episode to look at 3 incredible truths about who we are in Christ. And grab the full devotional workbook Finding Your Identity in Christ right here.

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A reminder of the Disclaimers & Disclosures Policy: I am an affiliate with many of the resources I recommend, which means I may receive a small commission if you make a purchase through my provided links. I never recommend products I don’t love! Also, I am a licensed therapist but this podcast is not therapy. It is not professional or personal advice to your specific situation. Get info about professional counseling here.