What are we talking about today?
You want to have great relationship with your kids. Of course you do! But does it sometimes feel like it’s a shot in the dark to enjoy real, deep quality time with your kids? We sometimes try so hard to make it happen, and it’s really frustrating when that falls short.
Well, today we’re diving into 5 tips about how to get more quality time with your kids and deepen your relationship.
Connect. Laugh. Have meaningful conversations. Build a bond that lasts. These tips will help any relationship, but we’re zooming in on that parent-child relationship right now! Have a great parenting relationship with more quality time.
Let’s dive in, friend.
Listen to Episode 48:
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Snag your resources here!
If today’s topic is meaningful to you, you’ll also want to check out these earlier podcast episodes that connect with this same topic:
- Episode 8 // Five practical strategies for building quality family relationships and deepening your family bond
- Episode 24 // Do you want to have a great relationship with your kids when they grow up? Then let’s look at how to be a purposeful parent TODAY.
- Episode 34 // How can we intentionally shape our family life? Psalm 1 in the Bible gives wisdom and biblical encouragement to the busy mom.
Let me also offer a FREE resource that I know will be helpful!
- Sign up for my FREE 5-day email course: 5 Tools Every Busy Mom Needs to Move Her Family From Autopilot to Intimacy. If you’re feeling stuck in a rut with your family, this free course will help you reconnect and refresh those relationships. (In less than 10 minutes a day for the course!)
[This post may contain affiliate links. If a purchase is made, I may receive a small commission at no extra charge to you.]
Today's Episode Highlights
Quality time is a requirement for a healthy relationship. If we aren’t spending time together, how will we really get to know each other? Enjoy each other? Build a bond together?
But before we dive into my 5 tips, let’s define what I mean by “quality time.”
I define quality time as intentional, enjoyable, memorable time with another person.
That’s it! It’s not too complicated, but it is also impossible to force quality time in a relationship. You can force time together, but you cannot make people enjoy themselves or force your way into special bonding moments or memories.
So, what can we do to get more quality time with our kids?
Here are my 5 secret weapons.
Tip #1: Quantity Time
First: QUANTITY TIME.
You will not succeed in getting quality time if you are not starting with quantity time. How else will you know what is most important to your person? Feel comfortable with them and able to talk about deep things?
You might luck into occasional quality time, but you’ll create opportunity for it with quantity time.
Tip #2: Follow Jesus' Example
NEXT: SHARE LIFE TOGETHER.
We can (and should) follow Jesus’ example of how he interacted with his disciples. After all, we want our children to become his disciples too!
And one of the things Jesus did with his disciples, which ensured ongoing quality time together, was sharing life together.
- Jesus intentionally called his disciples. It was not accidental that they had time together. We can do the same with our children: plan, and tell them we’re planning, time together.
- He invited them to follow him, and they lived life together. Of course, we live with our children too! But do we encourage them to follow us? Do we talk and act in a way that we want them to follow?
- Also, Jesus bonded with his disciples by enduring hardship together. We can do the same with our children. When we serve or volunteer together, go on missions trips, or sacrifice for the good of others, we build a bond that blesses our relationship.
Tip #3: Know Your Kids
MAKE SURE YOU KNOW YOUR KIDS.
This sounds easy enough, but when life gets really busy, it’s hard to know the deep details of our kids’ lives! Especially if we have more than one child.
Seek to know and understand what they like, enjoy, laugh at, and struggle with. Ask them questions. Spend time getting to know them.
This will allow you to speak into their life intentionally – which is quality time.
Tip #4: White Space
ALLOW MORE WHITE SPACE.
Allow enough white space in your schedule to be available in the moment your child needs you or wants you. It is so easy to fill up our schedule – and their schedule! – and then we feel guilty or rushed if there is a chance for quality time but we need to get on to the next thing.
Can you drop everything when you see that look on their face after school that tells you something happened? Can you spontaneously take them out for ice cream?
You never know when an opportunity to bond with your child will pop up. Be ready to say yes.
Tip #5: Be Prepared
FINALLY: BE PREPARED.
To make the most of the time you do get with your kids, you need to already know what you want to talk about with them.
What are the things that you believe are MOST important for your child to learn while they are living in your home?
Are there questions you want them to be able to answer when they are an adults? What characteristics or values do you want them to take into adulthood?
Have a list! By planning this out in advance, you will be ready to make the most of every opportunity, turning it into quality time by asking specific questions or leading the conversation into deeper territory.
If you’re struggling to make the most of time with your kids, make sure to sign up for the free 5-day email course (only 10 minutes a day!) and get the 5 Tools Every Busy Mom Needs to Move Her Family From Autopilot to Intimacy.
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A reminder of the Disclaimers & Disclosures Policy: I am an affiliate with many of the resources I recommend, which means I may receive a small commission if you make a purchase through my provided links. I never recommend products I don’t love! Also, I am a licensed therapist but this podcast is not therapy. It is not professional or personal advice to your specific situation. Get info about professional counseling here.
